31 March 2011

Miracles in Japan

I know, I've been neglecting the troubles in Japan. Earlier this month Japan was struck by the largest earthquake ever recorded in the region. It sent a tsunami across the Pacific, and irreparably damaged several nuclear power plants. The death toll is estimated at 18,000 the last time I heard on the radio. Officials in Japan are saying this is the worst disaster to hit the country since the end of the Second World War.

What with the ongoing "Kinetic Military Action™" the US is waging in Libya, and arming al Qaeda, and the Iranians releasing a video saying the Mahdi has come back from wherever he's been the past thousand years, and Israel has to be destroyed before the year is over so he can begin the end of days, and that Mahmoud Ahmadinajad is the only one on the planet who can see or hear him, so you better do what Ahmadinajad says, I haven't had the time to get to yet another depressing topic.

But all is not bad news! We are blessed to live in the time of Charlie Sheen and The Donald running for president. Need more proof? I bring you good tidings from Japan.

While the Japanese military was digging out bodies, 2,000 of them, one turned out to be alive. A four month old baby was found amidst the wreckage. The little girl has been returned to her family, who were also spared by the devastation.

Elsewhere (no map is provided, so place names mean nothing to me), a 70 year old woman, and her house, were harmlessly transported by the waves to a new location. A 60 year old man was also found floating on his roof ten miles out to sea. The fact that they were searching that far out is astonishing enough, let alone finding a surviver out there.

It's stuff like this that almost makes up for all the crap people are doing to screw the world.


Now, Blood for Oil!

Problem: The US has begun a third war, this time with Libya. We can't afford it, we have no exit strategy, and we are now arming al Qaeda!

Solution: Unleash the power of marketing to turn "war" into something sexy and techno that everyone wants!

(Runs 4 1/2 minutes)