30 May 2018

Jesse Duplantis: "Jesus Wants You To Buy Me A Jet"

Jesse Duplantis is a preacher of the "prosperity gospel", which is pretty much the opposite of what Jesus taught. Remember what Jesus actually said:

● "These things I have told you, that in me you might have peace. In the world you will have to suffer, but cheer up, I have overcome the world."
(John 16:33)

● "Sell all that you have and distribute it to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come and follow me." Hearing this the rich young man was deeply troubled and he left. Jesus saw this and said "How hard is it for the rich to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God."
(Luke 18:22-25)

The prosperity gospel states that if you pray a whole lot or something then God will give you money and Rolexs and $54 million jets. Mysteriously it only seems to work for the preachers, not the people who attend their seminars, which look more like pep talks than church.

In contrast, Jesus and the Apostles all lived difficult lives, survived through charity, and died violent deaths. The Apostle Paul speaks time and again how he's basically a poor nomad who is constantly being chased out of towns, beaten, starved, and exposed to the elements. He certainly didn't own a jet, or it's first century equivalent, like Caligula had two giant yachts because he didn't want to have orgies with the commoners crossing the Mediterranean. The early church in Jerusalem was sustained by everyone selling their possessions.

Now, 2018, Jesse Duplantis, the serpent, who has already been granted three jets by his gullible audience, "believes" for a brand new jet. He "burned them up for the Lord Jesus Christ", whatever that means. It's clear it doesn't mean the planes have ceased functioning, because he's still flying around in all three. Well now he needs a new one. And not just any jet, a $54 Dassault Falcon 7X, which Jesus specifically told him to get by name. This jet can go anywhere in the world without needing to refuel, because fuel is so expensive (more expensive than a new jet), especially when you own a "fuel farm", which I guess works like a dairy farm only with milking dinosaurs to get oil instead of cows.



From the Google cache of the Washington Times (fuck your ad blocker ban):
Televangelists Kenneth Copeland and Jesse Duplantis defended their use of private jets as a luxury means of travel, arguing that commercial planes are full of “a bunch of demons” that will bog down their busy schedules with prayer requests.

In a Dec. 29 segment of Mr. Copeland’s “Believer’s Voice of Victory” television program, Mr. Duplantis recalled a story where he was on a plane and had to unbuckle his seat belt to speak to God, The Blaze reported.

“You couldn’t have done that over an airline,” added Mr. Copeland. “Stand up and say, ‘What did you say, Lord?’”

“No, sir, no way,” Mr. Duplantis agreed.


"You can't get there from here!" This is the era of fucking Youtube. Astronauts can livestream from space, you don't need a jet to reach an audience physically. I think Jesus would appreciate that, the ability to reach people all over the world instantly.

Kenneth Copeland even says "We're in show business." That's why they need private jets. They're not in the business of saving souls, they're in "show business," which is worse than hooking when it comes to degeneracy.

As if that's not bad enough these Sadducees need to get up in airplanes and stand up and wave their arms to talk to God. God lives way up on the Moon and he can't hear you if you're stuck on the ground. You need to get up in a private jet, in a $50,000 suit with a $20,000 watch, and shout really loud because God is really old so he's hard of hearing.

To top it off they say that airplanes are "tubes filled with demons." Well, if you really are a man of God then exorcise the demons. That's one of the powers the Holy Spirit should have given you if you are legit. No, commercial airlines are not filled with demons, they're filled with regular people who watch your show and pay for your extravagant lifestyle.



No, those airplanes are not filled with demons, these fake preachers are. These are serpents from Hell taking advantage of the poor, the sick, and the despondent. And if there is a God and a Hell these two will burn in the lake of fire.

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